Please wait for her return.

This year, I didn’t text a single soul Merry Christmas, cos my starhub student plan has been downgraded to a stupid one with only 500 free smses. SO IM SORRY PEOPLE, yknow I still want to wish you! ;D

HERE GOES,
MERRY CHRISTMAS! <3

I had a great time up at Genting and for the first time up there, I did not venture to the outdoor theme park. In fact, all I did there was to sleep and eat and eat more then sleep. I refuse to check my weight out on the scale. Hahaha it’s gonna be a shock, but.. what’s new :\ It was freezing up there, at like 13 degs for the whole of 3 days. Only on the day of departure did the temp go up, to like 18! So unfair!! But standing out in the cold with fog and mist in your face must be the most awesome feeling (esp after 2 scoops of Baskin’ Robbins!). Just standing there, shivering, teeth chattering but so happy and filled with food..
AWW.

AND SO,
I’m gonna wake up a tad earlier to run tomorrow ;D Finally, RUNNING.
I swam 35 laps today and Im already aching like nobody’s business.
I so need to get back in shape :\

This is really random but I miss talking to Miss Sin Koonchin ):
If you’re reading this, I hope youre doing okay and have also carefully protected your heart from any more hurt. If he dares to hurt you, ever, again, I’ll fly over from Adelaide and personally kick his stinky ass.
Promise.

June, I know it’s rough but I’m dead sure youre gonna pull through and meet someone who’ll make you happier. Trust me xoxo.

I’m so thankful I have awesome friends, really. 
3 of which with special mentions for this entry,
Addie and Makmak and Jessho<3

And, the days are drawing closer to an end.
2010 is coming.
My 21st birthday chalet’s coming up in a month’s time (help???)
14days after which, I’ll be gone.

Suddenly I’m scared. Scared to go over, to start over, to be alone, really alone, to leave people behind here, to be forgotten, to be erased from people’s lives..
Please don’t forget me ): I’ll emo for life.

_________

Love’s a funny thing.
It comes when you least expect it.

We shall see (:

Trust, this whole world depends on this one word.
I trust you, my friend, just don’t let me down.

G’night, world,
sweet dreams (:

i will know (:

_________________

Some things just arent as simple as they seem.
Nothing ever is, and nothing can ever be, huh?

The person you trust the most may turn out to be the person who’ll feed others snide remarks behind your back.
The person you always assume to have been against you may just turn out to be otherwise.

For now,

I just trust myself. Simpler this way.

To all jerks in this world who have nothing better to do than to go around spreading malicious rumors,

fuck off and die.

SORRY, not jerkS.

YOU are perhaps the only one! tee hee

Zouk was a lot of fun last night!

Princess & the frog was.. expectedly lame.

End of story.

__________

At the start of a brand new relationship, people can promise you the world. They will tell you they can pick the stars for you, and they will give you all the happiness in the world and never make you cry, ever. They will assure you that you’re the only girl in their eyes and that will stay that way for the longest time to come. They will tell you they will call everynight just to hear your sleepy voice and they will send you right home to your doorstep just to see you safe. They can promise you the world of romance and eternity,

but their hearts will always be theirs – just like how words will only be words and promises can be rendered empty at the end of each day.

At the end of the relationship, you will look back and wonder where the promises went to.
You will blame, hate, cry and then stand up strong again.

It’s just the way life is.
You just gotta be able to pick yourself up and move on, somehow.

______

1month and 26 days before I fly.
I just wanna…………………

do so many things but i’ve so little time.

I won’t entrust my heart to anyone.
I’ll keep it safe with me.

G’night,world.
May tmrw be an awesome day for all.

Apparently not, for the most irritating  jerk in this whole wide world.
What more, I FORGAVE you. I said FORGET THE PAST we’ll start being friends again. So you happily took it for granted and continued spreading your vicious rumors. GO AHEAD, see if I give a shit.
I wish you’d just fuck off and die, maybe get run down by a car or truck (sorry i don’t feel the slightest bit of guilt cursing you this way) and then please, get denied access to heaven cos you clearly belong in hell.
And honestly, I’ve never met more of a scumbag than you in my entire life.

________________

Okay enough of cursing. Before I start believing in karma again :\

 Last night, I felt something strange bubbling inside me.

I really wanted to cry but I held it back. Like this choked feeling at the back of my throat. This very strangled sensation when I gulped back saliva and tears.
I want to leave, I don’t want to leave. I’ve changed, I’m still me. I love and I hate.

So many emotions so many different feelings running through my mind.

Feels like I’m going to lose so much going over, but.. somehow I know that’s not very true either.

okay pointless entry.

Off to meet my dearest shuuu for a tai tai lunch, followed by work.. (& suleen debs steffi gonna pop by tday!!!!)….

then zouk, after such a long time.

g’day, folks!

I’m actually feeling a tad outta place the whole day but some people just put me right again!

Finally worked on a sat w crazy niko and ee. <3 to the max.

crazy sales crazy crowds but we pulled through and had fun all the same.

fri was wala with someone who bought me free drinks all night :D shiok or??

then before work tday, went to catch couples retreat. quite a good show.

WELCOME TO EDEN SIOL.

love my daddy ^^ i shant mention names here cos i know SOMEONE will get jealous ahhaahahahha

and sooooooooo,  joined my DADDY for another round of 5/10 drinking with bits of the ring after work tonight. wm came by cathay for abit, nice seeing him (:

so now at 5am im finally home, slightly intoxicated by alcohol and smoke but im still sober enough to type an entry. heheehhe.

aweseome bel, or?

SEE Y’ALL TMRW.

i just wanna sleep away all pain, thanks.

Make a guess? HAHAHA

Beautiful Bel Back from Beautiful Bali!

Photos will be up once debs and suleen have finished compiling MY album ;D

It was overall a good trip. Stressful moments passed quickly with thoughts of crazy nights with the two crazy women.
Mojitos, martinis, beers and cocktails and _______ under moonlight and tonnes of rolling around in bed, poking, tickling, laughing through the nights despite early mornings. Had a complimentary aromatherapy massage, courtesty of Laguna hotel. Aweeesomeeee!

<3 my bitchy friends! ;D

Met up with the PW gang for lunch tday before heading down to office to disturb the rest ^^

_________________

So, it’s all set.

Visa’s been approved, air ticket booked.
All that’s left is to pack and that’s the thing I hate the most. I’ll get started TOMORROW. Just to dump things that I think I wont need. Hopefully I’ll manage to clear my wardrobe up a little.

AND,

i’ve put on quite a bit of weight, but thank God I’m not feeling very conscious about it yet.
BUT before I start noticing the extra flabs everywhere, I’m going to be a good girl and get back to my exercise regime.
I WILL gym twice a wk and swim thrice a wk. SOMEHOW SOMEHOW I’ll make it work.
HEHE.

________________

Jessho, here’s a big hug for you, and i’ll see you really soon <3

________________

Being away felt really good. It kinda felt like when I was in Berlin, except Bali is really crazy hot and Berlin was freeze-ass cold. Clears my head each day when I just have to think bout work and sleep and chilling.

Now it’s back to reality……………………..

So i’m gonna hit the showers and rest before heading out ltr.

<3 to all, only to those who’ve missed me! ;D

Once upon a time, I get sick once a year.
Now, I get sick everytime I go abroad. Wtf.

I’ve been sniffling and sneezing the whole day sitting at the hotel lobby (non-aircondition-ed, mind you, with hot sun streaming through all day long).
I’m beginning to get annoyed.

Wait, I already am.
Skipped lunch. It’s 525pm now.
I guess dinner will be gone case too, judging from the situation now.
Another long late night, and to think Hari said he wanted to bring us out tonight.
IMPOSSIBLE, thanks to an AWESOME BOSS -.-

full of complaints today but whatever gives.

Apart from work stuff,

Bali’s really a beautiful place.
I had the trial dinner for tmrw’s gala dinner last night by the beach with the girls, and it was perfect. Royal Balinese food served ROYALLY with customization etc etc etc and srsly, I felt like a princess for the meal ^^ of cos, right after, it was smack back into reality with tonnes of work again.

Hari’s flying back tmrw, Debs going back on the 7th, sian…..
8th left me and suleen, hopefully the witch really goes for her whitewater rafting then we’ll get the day off!!!

Okay whatever, I’m going to pee now, cannot take the heat already, cannot tahan my  nose also.

CANNOT TAHAN THE THAIS, WHY ARE THEY NOT HERE YET TMD.

(#*$A)(@#*$)(@*#$)(@*#)$(*#)(*$)(@#*$)# CCB.

shurun says:
*sob
*haha
*i tot ulu pandan one
Christabel says:
*dont act lor sob sob wad
*yah
shurun says:
*got internet access meh

____________

So this has been the response I’ve been getting from all my friends who saw me online. HAHAHA
AND YES LAH MY KAMPUNG QUITE ONZ ONE, got wireless somemore leh. & all my freaking cousins are on fb?!?!?!
That includes my 9mth old cousin, who has had an account specially created for him (courtesy of his mom, my aunt) HAHA

Was up in Genting for a day while my dad whiled his money/time away in the casino..
So I just walked around and blah. AND HAD BASKIN ROBBINS WITH MY PAPA BEFORE HEADING DOWN. YAY X324908230498234. Even he agrees it’s awesome ice cream! Three cheeeers!

SO ANYWAY,

im going to have my awesome kampung lunch now.

UPDATE AGAIN LTR. OR YOU GUYS WHO MISS ME LIKE SHIT CAN CATCH ME ONLINE TONIGHT APPROX 8-11PM OR SO!!!!

<3<3<3<3<3

P.S. Please say you’re missing me hor, y’all. Don’t break my heart ^^

Sat was an eventful day!
Headed down to watch the regatta w june, wanted to say hello to mark but cldnt find him!, saw tonnes of other people (like stupid sam who gave me a wet hug) and then just hung around w june and her rpdb friends. Sometimes I feel quite rp-ish. HAHAHAHA.

Then to the smu flea market where I bought heaps of stuff for obscenely low prices. Don’t slaughter me.
Met with munting and jess there! Headed for dinner and work.
AAAAAND,

the whole gang of them were there!!!!
Jess Addie Munting Tzeling Weisiang Weiming
I think I didn’t miss anyone out hor?

So fun, to keep going out and disturb them, taking photos and laughing madly hahahahaha
<3

___________________

I need some time away from everybody to find myself again.
So, the next week back in Malaysia with good ol’ kampung house, dirt cheap roadside food and good family company is going to help.
I’ll come back better and stronger, just like before.

________________________

There was this one night, when she sat with legs dangling off the balcony, looking at the sparsely scattered stars in the night sky. Very slowly downing the drink she was holding, her eyes began to cloud with memories. Pain, a faraway object she thought had long left her life, resurfaced. Her heart was convulsed in agony and travail, with confusion satiating her mind. She just wanted out that very moment, and for her old life to recompense once more.
The words never failed to riff through every waking moment, the impact never once quelled even after months.
And so she knew, it was about time to take the plunge, to wander out of this lonesome kingdom she’d been entrapped in for the longest time, to leave the broken pieces behind,
and to start believing in life again.

& so she did.

______________________

Glad to have meet up with shu even if just for awhile, glad to have spent the night with makjl and laupy, glad to have seen xy ht and cat too.
I know some things have changed, maybe more will, but I know somehow somethings never will.
I never want to despair and lose again.
I never want to take the wrong route again.

_________________

I like to do nothing on my off days, which aren’t a lot.
Today is one of them, and I had dimsum buffet with qx and then we just bummed around at gloria jean’s taking photos, looking at the rain pour and drinking our coffee (chocolate-filled, nevertheless) hahaha.

_____________

Here’s a little something for you:
take care while i’m away, yknow i’ll think of you.
xoxo