UNGLAM AT HER BEST

i wish i could make you smile 24/7, happy 24/7, be the best that you’ll ever have and anything just to love you the best I can.

Where you are, is where I wanna be. 

 It’s kinda cliche to still do resolutions, since I don’t really remember what resolutions I make by the end of january anyway. But, I’ll try.

1. For my friends.
I haven’t been a good friend to many, esp in year 2006. I shouldn’t mention names, but you know who you are. In 2008, I’ll try harder, I really will. I don’t know how yet, but in any way possible.

2. For my family.
I haven’t been the best daughter either (but maybe sometimes they ought to look at it from my POV) but yeah, I’ll try to be better and do more for the family.
OKAY I FUCKING CHANGED MY MIND I REALLY DONT LIKE MY FAMILY SOMETIMES I WISH I WERE LYING. They all should shoot their brains out and wake up a bit.

3. For my studies.
I want to see how I do for this common tests first, cos I really put my soul into studying for it ): I somehow think I won’t really score well, as usual. And I really would like to see at least a 3 for my GPA for the next 1.5 years in ngee ann. If mugging at starbucks everyday is what it takes to get good grades, then that’s what I’ll do ): Sigh.

4.  For canoeing.
Actually I don’t know why I’m including this. I don’t even feel up to the strenuous 234234days-a-week training anymore. I feel so pathetic and weak I’m even contemplating to skip tmrw’s training. I don’t feel like I can move an inch to even run, or lift my flabby arms up to paddle. Whao this is really bad. I don’t really recall ever having taken a “break” from canoeing before, so I suppose this is my “break”, since I haven’t been paddling in like, a month. Not even gyming, or running. This is.. really bad. So bad, that I forsee aching muscles and lousy stamina tomorrow.

5. For holiday/money.
Come the next term break, I hope I’ll be soaking in Adelaide’s sun, picking fruits and earning money with my baby.

6. I must plan my future by the end of next year cos I don’t want to be an aimless soul roamng aound while all my other friends are going into universities, do I?

Last, but not least,
7. To be a better, more understanding, more caring, less clingy, more selfless girlfriend, to the best guy ever. He deserves that at least, if not more. It’s been a rough year, with all the problems we’d been through, but we’ve come so far, too far to let it go now. Come 2008, we don’t know what we’re going to face, but we’re going to do it together. And, I’ll be seeing 2009 with you, sparklers in hand.

That’s all for now. I can’t really think more, I’m quite tired actually.

____________

Whao it’s really fast. Right now, it’s 30th December 2007, 1219am already. In less than 48 hours, we’ll be going through a brand new year. Somehow, it doesn’t feel any different. I can’t even remember what I did on new year’s eve last year but I hope this year will be a good one, a memorable one.

I don’t know, I’d love to say I think I’ve grown up since the start of 2007 till the end of it, but I don’t feel much more grown up than before. I kinda think I’ve solidified a bit more, like more of a recluse hahaah. Okay kidding. Just thinking back, my birthday this year was pretty sad.  No more primary school days where my mom will throw embarrassing parties and invite all my girlfrends over to play pass-the-parcel. No more secondary school days where friends and classmates buy cakes and you have to blow many candles. I think I’m getting old. I don’t want to turn nineteen. I can’t believe I spent this year’s birthday studying BCA-.- That, must be the saddest thing for any business student. On a brighter note, dinner with shu and jl the night before was good, and I had fun with the sprinters at Sentosa in the day.

Which brings me back to recall, how jh and I shared a cab to clarke quay, and he stupidly sprained his leg running after the bus then texting me but I took eons to reply and then he dint reply and blamed my ultra late reply. Hahaha. Then how suddenly, we were planning to go out after exams to catch a movie. And well, that kinda failed. Then the 3rd day of chinese new year, we went out and had the best day of our lives. Okay, my life. It was simple, sweet, romantic and unadorned. Haha and so the story goes on. My life truly started then.

Did I say I was tired? Hhahaah.

So all in all, it’s been a rather eventful year. I just wish I were looking forward to 2008 more.
It’s seemingly a long year, with the start of Year3 and all, and also seemingly yet another end to another school’s life.

God, at this point of time, I’d like to add, I’ve this really loser friend, whose name I shall not mention.
loserfriend: You mean, you don’t club even if the pple around you do?
me: er, what’s wrong. I’m happy not clubbing.
loserfriend: don’t you find that really pathetic?
me: ……. not really. Am I?
loserfriend: boring shit.

HELLO I CLUB OR DONT CLUB WHAT’S YOUR BUSINESS YOU TALK TO ME LIKE ONCE IN 234923048 YEARS ANYWAY WHY DO YOU CARE -.-  I’m no loser, just cos I don’t club my life away.

ZZZZZZZ. Thank you puiyin you’re no loser too.

I really should stop here and go to bed.
But I don’t feel too good doing that when he’s not back yet.
I’ll just go lie down and finish my book.  It’s getting really exciting.

Okay maybe i’ll just watch soccer.

BORING SATURDAY NIGHT.

PHOTOS GALORE!

my beautiful 2year old cousin.

okay she seems really squirmy and upset here :x
i kinda forced her into it. HAHA

this is a lot better right! heeh so cute!!
BOTH.

this cousin my mom and aunt term TERROR RASCAL.
and my momma there.

and, my dady shopping ok!?!?!?

i just can’t resist another picture of her!

from my baby. the rarest of all, BLUE!

bedokjetty(:

my retarded auntie!!

It feels good to be back in the kampong for a couple of days.
Everyday wake up eat, sleep, go out watch soccer, eat supper, sleep. Like pig please.

Schedule’s pretty fixed, if I hadn’t come down with a bad cold on the second day. I sat out on all the good food ): So isntead of gaining the expected 5kg, I gained only 2. HAHA.
Met up with a ton of cousins and relatives, with the usual questions all in chinese like er,
1. Wah SO BLACK AH. row boat ah???
2. So got go SEA GAMES NOT? -.-
3. Got bf alr ah, when get married ah!
4. Wah bf very handsome hor. So lucky!

YAWNS.

So, down to KL on a road trip. Had lotsa fun (and very minimal car sickness on the way to KL, heng) with my baby cousin who’s just learning to speak and she called me JIE JIE! WAH happy happy! HAHAHA. Shall post the pics when I’m finally not lazy to upload! Shopping shopping and shopping….. for presents for my aunts and people, rather than for myself ): So sad. The
Last minute decided to go up to Genting to spend Christmas while my dad went to the casino. The security was crazy, like 5 guards to a flight of stairs?! -.- Managed to get a room despite the lastminute-ness but we all had no clothes to change into…. and being a really budget hotel, First World doesnt even provide soap/shampoo/toothbrush and only ONE towel for a miserable rate of RM220 for a pathetic night. Wahlau. Deprived shit.

The whole trip, well, was generally bad. HAHA the kampong days were fine, minus the cold, but going to KL was horrid. i couldn’t wait to get back to spore. To my baby, and to meet auntiesue again! (:

7 long days without you, love, they were unbearable but I’m back baby,
and today was fabulous(:
I absolutely love late evening naps into the night (:

Currently very excited bout the next term break!
May be heading over to auntiesue’s at adelaide for a month, or so, with the love and err, pick fruits and enjoy a lil farm/suburban life before the school term starts again!
weeeeeeeee.

4/6 tentative gathering on the 4th! Hope I’ll be able to make it.

and OH, the night cycling with the sprinters was fun!!!
Like, some bonding thang btwn the jrs and snrs! hehehehe it was great though everyone was pretty tired out haahaha

Suddenly NCM doesn’t seem so important anymore.
I kinda feel like taking a T1 for it, but I ‘m kinda scared I can’t finish the marathon alone, Godknowswhatdistance. Plus, I haven’t trained a.k.a gymed and rowed (maybe except once, slack one) in a month plus. I don’t know how to get back in shape, especially when school starts the projects will start piling up again. Speaking of which, I think I’d better talk to my group pple about our tlaw and ecd and tdm proj. I’ve totally lost touch since I went away. ):

I kinda like being fairer.. like not so tanned. HAHA. die.

this, is the boy, who bought me my favorite flower, with my favorite accompanying flower.
say hello to my love.
Just.. dont hug him =D

is a nice song.

but not when ive to be away from my baby for that long ):

suddenly im at a loss for words, so this is all im going to give to you:

je t’aime and youre in my heart every moment.
always thinking of you.
youre my baby kiss kiss!
and, i can’t wait to see you again(:
plus sparklers and rockets.

We train at kallang. During trainings, we go down to kallang. And guess what, even when there are no trainings, some hardworking idiots ALSO go down to kallang.
hardworking idiots = me and jh
go down to kallang not to row, but to go to……

kallang leisure park. wah so exciting!
initially quite excited, but when we saw the inside of the place..
bare like hell.
BUT WHO CARES LAH WE JUST WANNA SKATE AND BOWL AHHAHA

this is how deceiving pictures can be.
he looks like hes going at top speed right?
truth is, no lor.
he was about to fall before i snapped this.
=D HELLO BOYFREND.

so we skated till our legs were blistered and hurting and we left to bowl.

then, being the romantic us, we decided to take a stroll around kallang HAHAHAHA
like at the smelly suspension bridge where we camwhored.

please, look at my baby’s cute face!

he’s waiting for someone to go hug him lor.

so i decided hug not ’nuff, must kiss kiss!

pretend to scratch head to show off biceps only lor.

i also have, smaller only what.

like some frog lor, please. hahaah

like, i totally want to jump into kallang waters lor -.-

and, presenting to you the sprinters’ second home!
where countless capsizes took place
where we train under the bloody sun
where we train under the nice drizzles
where we row 4 triangles sometimes
where dbs and ducktours are the bitches
where,
we’re happiest at..

-taken by jh

_________

tmrw’s gonna be a blaaaaast!
koba w the love
night cycling with the sprinters
and whoknowswhat in the day! wheeeee!

AND WAHLAU LOOK AT THIS PIC

she totally looks like a man, but no, she’s a fecking olympic female canoeist.
Fiona Pennie. Man like hell.

GAHHH.

lucky.

byebye!

Let’s guess, who’s at the top of the table still, after three months?

THIS, is the goal of the season, I tell you. Gallas’s the man.

HAHAHA CHEERS TO GUNNERS STILL REIGNING!
Mind you, star players like Van Persie wasn’t even playing first line.

The only sad news was that, Man Utd won Liverpoollast night too. Bloody hell, Tevez was tyco like shit.

’nuff bout soccer!

______________

Heheh just got back from a good day spent with mr lin. Watched a movie that was pretty lame, cheesy, corny, not reality-based, and practically un-understandable cos we still don’t know what the plot’s about, but we watched it anyway. Swam in the drizzle and freeze-ass water but it was good. I felt tired after a couple of laps, but maybe it was cos we already did a lot of cardio before that. Woo, haven’t gymed in 234908234 years. Supposed to do that with cin tmrw, but she fell sick. So, Ive decided to work out a little with my pathetic 2kg dumbbells by doing endurance. HAHAHA.
Anyway main point is, I’m happy (:
Mr Lin made me really happy (:

No Christmas, no 10th month together, but the rest of our lives makes up for those.

But please go home safe & sound ):
je’taime.

_____________

I wish I could a better friend to some, and a better person.

I think I should start replying to tags. HAHAHA.

chinchong: yah lor if joanne peh had won, mediacorp would have closed down!
chinkoon: yah i play the piano cannot is it!
addie: HAHAHAHA CAN LAH my arms not that short okay ):

mr lin: even though you dint tag, i’ll reply what you would have said. i love you too! =P

_____________

aiyer i look so fat in it.

good ol’ days.

this never fails to crack me up hahaahah STUPID MEL

the silly mr lin (:

___
EDITTED!!
i must blog about this. Meet my boyfriend, junhan. hahahaha

so filled to the brim says (1:57 AM):
ji diaaaaaaaan
me and mrs.tan says (1:57 AM):
?
what thing jia dan
so filled to the brim says (1:57 AM):
ji dian?
=P
me and mrs.tan says (1:57 AM):
oh
why egg?
so filled to the brim says (1:57 AM):
!!!!!!!!!!
JI DIAN
WHAT TIME
so filled to the brim says (1:58 AM):
haahahahahaha

sorry i didnt mean to call
but i couldnt fight it
i guess i was weak
couldnt even hide it…

vida, give me back my fantasy
the courage that i need to live
the air that i breathe.

awesome and beautiful.

__________

I’ve been feeling very tired and sleepy after common tests.
like today, I woke up at 10, and when it barely reached 3pm, i was already sleepy. so shu and i decided to nap instead of finishing mr&mrs smith. yesterday, i think i slept through most of the conversations at rocky master too. somthang’s wrong hahahaha.

It’s very easy to make promises, and equally easy to break them.
I see my friends around me, all bearing the brunt of broken promises. It hurts to see them in pain, yet not being to do anything. Brings about lots of thinking and sometimes the heart just weighs heavier as the skies become darker. I don’t like spending nights at home, cos I always let my thoughts run wild. I’ll think about my uneventful life, how unfulfilling it is, how it is that I haven’t done so many things, and how I cannot just die tomorrow. So many places I want to see for myself, so many things I haven’t yet said to people I love, so many things I haven’t done. Don’t make promises if you know you can’t keep them. It hurts more to know the words that come out are just said to make one happy, and not because you really want to keep to those words. It hurts a hell lot more waiting for the promise that eventually will be broken. So don’t, don’t ever hurt anyone you love this way.

Suddenly, I can’t wait to fast forward my life to fifty years down the road. I hope I’ll be retired by then, happily married with kids and possibly grandkids!, and a few wrinkles won’t kill but not too many please. I want to skip this poly thing, I can’t really take it anymore I don’t know why, and I want to get past the working life too, I want to skip all the raw emotions an adult may face, and go straight to old and happy. I want to sit in deckchairs in an open garden reading my book all day, cooking meals for my love then some tvee and dvds before heading to bed. I want to OMG WAIT PAUSE MY ENTRY.

YVONNE LIM JUST WON THE BEST ACTRESS IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS SINCE HER DEBUT!!!!! WAHLAU YES SHES SO BLOODY GOOD AND PRETTY SHE TOTALLY DESERVES IT LOR. Actually, jessecaliu huangbiren ivylee deserve to get it too, anyone but joanne peh lah. YVONNELIM WAS SO BLOODY GOOD IN METAMORHOSIS DAMN GOOOOOOOOOOD. YAAAAAAAAAAAY.

okay back to what I was saying,
yeah I just want some quiet in my life.

Sometimes I wonder how much I mean. How far will you go to show me how you feel. How much effort am I worth.
Sometimes you just wonder how some people feel about you, if youre annoying, or nice.
Sometimes it’s very easy to want to cry, cos you don’t really know what to do, and what you’re doing and why you’re screwing your own life up but sometimes, it’s just easy to be a girl cos you can just cry at about everything. Haha lucky us.

actually i was searching for this ring I used to have, this strawberry crystal studded ring. hahaha when my mom first bought it for me, i was like, NO WAY IT’S SO CHEESY but after awhile i realised it’s really quite pretty. then it got all rusty ): came across this picture on google that really resembled the ring but it was far classier (mine was prolly just a cheapo $4.90 kinda, as can be verified from the rust). reminds me that i was searching for a banana ring, or fruit rings, early this year but never really got down to it.
BUT ANYWAY,

i happened to come across this really sweet picture and it made me smile. look at the stupid boy, so cute! and the girl’s so pretty. hahahaha.

okay what a looooooong entry. im just really, bored. wish i were out.

whatever. byebye!

SHURUN IS GOING TO KILL ME.
SHE’S REACHED WOODLANDS AND IM STILL BLOGGIN BUT NVRM LAH HOR. HAHAHAHA

hee hee went for breks w my bro and pops at this place we haven’t been to in like 24324234 years and i cycled pops there okay. i swear he’s gained 10kg or somethang, cos my legs are aching already. then we went to the market to shop! for like, prawns, yam and stuff to fry. yes yours truly will be doing the damn frying ): and my dad actually asked me to ask shurun to come over and taste it later haahahahahah.

and, i played the piano after having not touched it in ages! heeheheh managed to complete my grade7 exam piece, the one that i love a lot but my running keys are a little, messed up. like cannot control my fingers properly so they all cling clang at once hahaha. must go practise a little bit of scales first before doing the pieces again, but hell yeah, i feel gooood!
thinking of finally learning a piece from mozart’s sonata but the pieces look a little.. confusing :X

and i love my baby so (:

good half a sunday!

First things first,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAPH!
you the best k2 partner me can have! heehee.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MENG!
but doubt you’ll read this hahaha.

_______

 The heart’s a lot lighter now.
Finally came to a realisation of what’s the right thing to do, and what isn’t. I’ve decided that I can do this even if it kills, but first I’ll have to tell myself I can, and then I’ll have to try. From the start, it’s because I didn’t see a need to try so I didn’t and before it can all fall on me, I’m going to do something to prevent it from happening. Cos I’m strong and I’m smart enough to know what to do, I can do it. It’s time to back off a little and give myself some breathing space too.
Come tonight, the tears will fall, but things won’t change and we’ll remain the same.
I’ll be a better lover now that I’ve cleared my mind.

_______

A random thought.
Shu especially went to buy me doughnuts before meeting me last night! (: So sweet right. Except that if she hadn’t, she could have hopped on my train and I wouldnt have had to alight at woodlands. LOLLLLL.

Surprises are beautiful.
(:

I hope I can find something meaningful and beautiful to get him for Christmas.
mmm.
No more ideas lolll

_______

Gawd, mel just sent me an sms saying she wants to come over and bake?!?!?!
NOOOOO. Unless she offers to clean up and all as well. HAHAHAHA OH she just replied saying she doesnt mind cleaning up oh my goodness hahahaha
Speaking of which, I rmbr how desperate I was to dye my hair back to black after a disastrous green dye that screwed up and spens and i had to go over to mel’s place at night and mess her stupid living/dining room up! HHAHAHA.
WAIT NOW SHE WANTS TO GO TO THE SCIENCE CENTRE. REALLY.
_______

I’ve been thinking a lot lately, and maybe that’s why my brain feels like it’s going to explode any moment during the exam period. Oh and no wonder it couldnt absorb much, cos half of it is filled up with useless stuff hhaah.

Wah cannot be, everton just scored one more goal making it 2-0 against westham in the 93rd minute. What’s with this season and all its last minute goals!??!
May the gunners kick the blues’ asses tmrw and reignnn!
May the reds’ asses get kicked and liverpool win!

Okay , off I go.

nobody and nothing, can take this away from us, ever.

dear auntie agony,
YOU ARE JUST BLOODY SHURUN LOR.
AHAHHAHA.
The ban-mian still tasted as awesome as the past’s ones, and thank you for drinking NORMAL COKE instead of the yucky coke light, all for me =D KNEW YOU LOVE ME SO.
Wahahahahhaahha and, stop going to yishun lah okay. AHHA.